often end up misinterpreting the events thereby causing you to feel abandoned, afraid, unsure, abused and grossly misunderstood. In your particular case, you’ve no doubt experienced similar traumatic events never being able to release the detrimental magnetic influential hold they have on you. Instead of being formidably present now, you have drifted and continue to drift in and out of current unrelated circumstances.
Aborted memories shout relentlessly of how you were part of a committed unit that was severed without notice by and through the people who you believed cared about you. There is substantive proof that this experience left you ripped apart never having gotten over the pain of betrayal associated. Left over grief from the loss actually haunts your vibrant effusive personality to the point where it feels unnaturally foreboding. In essence, blame shadows your demeanor. This state of affairs needs healing. A deeply resonating mother complex surrounds the loss. Predominantly, you conduct yourself in a smothering role that is not very sexy, appealing or attractive to the opposite sex (mate).
You are seriously contemplating matters that pertain to: personal strength, endurance, fortitude, conviction and determination. It is an extremely private matter better explored alone. [Which seems so paradoxical because at this stage of the game, you are ready to de-ass and shine!] No longer do you need to be the center of attention for others. The entertaining jig is up! Time to move on to another more rewarding venue. You are interested in personal growth, expansion and travel! Pleasure invoked, fantasies explored, beneficial gain comes to the forefront. As far as you are concerned, the incessant worrisome Ego has shown off enough